Emily Kofford and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

Dear the people of my life,

I would like to start by saying without all of you my life would be bliss.

To my 3D art teacher. Grading based on your opinion, not OK on so many levels. I worked hard. I liked my project. While it might not be perfect or Ideal, a C+? Seriously, did you see the project made out of marshmallows and tooth picks? Mine was a right site better then that! I don't know what you put into your little vegan breakfast shakes but I would check on that situation cause I think it's doing something to your head. If you ever dock me again for some small difference of opinion on how you would have done it, I will pull your nasty belly shirt over your head and suffocate you! ...oh and by the way calling your boyfriend your "partner" just makes you sound like a lesbian, or someone with serious relationship issues. Just saying.

To the people of my awesome Job. A.) Sometimes less is more. We don't need bows, greenery, glitter, rustic ornaments, and antique gadgets on everything. B.) If I find someone to work for me that day that probably means I don't want to come in. Even if it's for a few hours just to decorate trees. C.) if you need someone to cover your shift how about calling one of the other 5 people who don't already have a shift, instead of the one person who does...cause newsflash no one wants to work a double. D.) There is no need to redo everything everybody ever does. People have different ideas of what is cute, if you don't agree, get over it. E.)a little head's up would be greatly appreciated. Scheduling important mandatory events a week before they go down...not cool. and F.) last but definitely no least, paychecks on time would be nice.

Now, to all of the other miscellaneous people. I LET YOU STAY IN MY HOUSE AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? How dare you Jaimen Brady. How dare you. and You who wears size 2 pants and is the skinniest girl in the house...did you just say you're fat? Well thank you, that just makes me AWESOME. and as for you, you are just a stupid boy.That's right BOY. Immature fool.


Thank you, and have a nice day.

Pass it on

I've been thinking about advice lately. How often it's given, and how rarely it's taken to heart. It's strange how easily we can brush it aside or let it impact every decision we make based solely on the mouth that spoke it. It's especially mind boggling how one person can tell you something that makes no sense and then someone else can offer you the exact same thing and it all of a sudden becomes the best thing you've ever heard. Is it favoritism? Ignorance? or just plain stupidity?

Well anyways I've decided to compile a list of 10 good pieces of advice I've been given. You can take it or leave it, it really makes no difference to me.

1. Never, ever cut your own bangs

2. Don't by your books at the bookstore

3. Always pay your tithing first, the lord will take care of the rest

4. Boys are like buses, if you miss one there's a next one coming

5. If it's free, remember you're getting what you paid for.

6. Always, Always, Always forgive

7. Never test the water with both feet

8. Before criticizing someone you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. Whenever making an important decision include the lord, two heads is better then one.

10. The only thing to do with good advice it to pass it on. It is never of any use to oneself.

Hello, this is your conscience...

Sometimes I worry about being too desensitized, but then my conscience sets in. It's undeniable and definitely not ignorable. For me it's pretty much physical illness. I get a shaky and I get this terrible stomach ache to the point where I think I'm either going to throw up or pass out. I can't concentrate, until it is taken care of. Is this normal? I have no idea, but in time I've come to realize that it is one of the greatest blessings in the world. When it's to the point that you cannot physical function until you have set things right, it's kind of hard to do the wrong thing. Not to say that I don't do the wrong thing...lets be real here, but I have never done the wrong thing and felt fine about it.

So today I was thinking about this in terms of driving. It's like you've got a destination programed into your GPS, you make a wrong turn and that insanely annoying lady comes on to tell you that you've gone off course and you need to turn around, and she doesn't stop until you do as she says. How stupid are we if we just keep driving in the wrong direction? Maybe we think that we can find an alternative way back, perhaps the music is up so loud that we can't hear her, or maybe we just think we are mistaken in what we are hearing. Well, wrong, wrong, and wrong. Just turn around, the farther you go the longer and harder it will be to get back. As for those who don't hear, there is approximately 3 seconds between songs, 3 seconds. Not a lot of time, but plenty enough to here her plea...turn back. Finally, it's better to be safe then sorry. You don't want to end up in the middle of no where on an empty tank wondering how you got here.

Sure it's frustrating that even though the path is clearly laid out we still fall off course. But we shouldn't worry, just as sure as the beeping sound of the GPS, he will not fail us. We will surely know, and the decision will be ours.

Thoughts I have at 10:43 PM

Guys should have to go through some kind of training before they are eligible to date, in which they have to experience having a period. Cramps, mood-swings, heaving bleeding, chocolate cravings, the whole shebang. Only then should they be able to ask a girl out.

Would you rather be a hippopotamus, or a walrus? ..and don't just say walrus because the Beatles sing about one. Really think about it. I mean neither are super attractive, but both are kinda cool in their own unique ways.

What if all food was like gum? We just chewed it for the flavor, but never actually swallowed it? That reminds me of Willy Wonka when he has all those different flavors of gum.

I wish I could drop out of college and spend the rest of my days as a painter...and actually make a respectable living out of it. I mean I am an art major, but really.

eX's and O's

So the other day I was talking to my friend Micail at work about ex boyfriends. We decided that the whole concept is so backwards. We spend all this time getting to know someone, and letting them really see who we are, and then just because we decide they're not the person we want to spend the rest of our lives with we just quit. Quit the relationship, quit the friendship, and quit everything that we've worked towards. These so called "ex's" should be out closest group of friends, and our go to people. I'm not saying that we should call them up every Friday night, but when we're having a rough day, or just need someone to talk to, they should be there. How come instead we just ignore and avoid? How can you go from spending 24/7 with someone to never even talking. These people know us on a more intimate level then most people, they understand how we work and think. How did breakup come to mean erase from life?

Maile Peters (aka Miley Cyrus)

This is my roommate Maile. She is one of the coolest people I know, and I decided to dedicate this blog to her because she is getting married and moving, across the country, to North Carolina, at the end of the month. Yeah, I'm pretty torn up about it, but also super excited for her!

So first off let me introduce her with 10 random facts

1. She LOVES grapefruits
2. She's an Aggiette at USU
3. She's engaged to Mitch Bassett
4. Her favorite animal is a giraffe
5. She enjoys watching Family guy
6. She's kinda pigeon-toed
7. Her celebrity look-a-like is Reese Witherspoon
8. She's 5' tall, but she lied on her license and said 5' 1"
9. She has a dead front tooth
10...and distorted bones


So let me tell you what's so great about Maile. Other then being gorgeous, and unbelievably kind, Maile is also really disciplined and really smart. She just seems to have everything together. The best part about her is that although she has every reason to be overly confident and even stuck up, she's one of the most down to earth people I know. She doesn't like being the center of attention, she gets nervous talking in front of a group of people, and she has no problem being a complete weirdo. I knew we would be good friends ever since the first night we hung out created a whirl pool in the hot tub by swimming in circles. haha

So Maile I love your face off, I'm going to miss you SOOO much! Best of wishes to you and Mitch!

(Aren't they a gorgeous couple?)

revenge has no end

Last night as I drove home from Logan I tuned into someone on the radio talking about forgiveness. She said that due to something they had discussed earlier she had felt compelled to ask forgiveness from two really good friends she had lost some time ago due to something she had done to offend them. This got me thinking about grudges today, and the way they create a disgusting kind a restraint against you. We let them literaly run our lives and all for what? We think about letting go, but our pride overrides and we decide that they are the ones who need to apologize, and that it's their problem not ours. Carrying this kind of anger in your heart doesn't do anything, you'll never forget it, or get over it, because it is not resolved. You are literally limited to what you can do and where you can go all because you're scared of running into them. It works either way, whether it's avoiding asking forgiveness, forgiving, or a combination of the two.


Well today I took care of a grudge that has been weighing me down for four years. Four LONG years. I swollowed my bloody pride, apologized, and asked for forgiveness. I was overwelmed by how relieved I felt. She responded in the same way, and it's all behind me. It literally took ten minutes to resolve these feelings I had been carrying around for years. How ridiculous is that?

So why does it take so much of our energy and so long for us to summon the guts to do this? Is it because of all the inbetween information we receive from people that really know nothing about the situation? Is it because of our foolish pride? or it because in general we are lazy people and it seems like the easiest way out?

I've decided that most people (well girls anyways) have similar situations to this. So I hope if you read this you make a resolve to call up your friend, or email, or whatever it is you do and get that weight off your chest. Because sometimes we don't realize our shortness of breath until we're allowed a deep one.